The apartment has landed.

I have a place in Montreal. I will be moving sometime this month. My roomie seems to be wonderful. She is a healer, she has a cat, she dates women and is super friendly and excited to have me as a roomie. As I am excited to have her as a roomie. She really seems great.

To be honest, I’m very excited about the whole Montreal thing, but I am also terrified. Recently a friend told me about a conversation she had had with a mutual friend of ours who said she wished she was as independant as me. I’m incredibly flattered by her remark, but sometimes I feel very NOT independant. I rely on so many people for so much. Which isn’t really a bad thing, but it seems like a bit of a sham when people say “You’re so independant” and I’m barely lifting a finger to get things done.

I suppose they mean I have an independant spirit, but that’s something else I’m not so sure about. Just this morning I was daydreaming about domestication and thinking maybe I would just abandon the whole Montreal plan and just live in Toronto and move in with le boy and get married and have babies and live happily ever after. All the while I was laughing to myself though, because it’s so not realistic at this point in time. It wouldn’t happen like that. I would spend a couple months in Toronto and enjoy the fact that I can see Sarah and Cameron and Jeff and Alex and maybe even Tro (although that might not happen for other reasons) and maybe I would even patch things up with the girls from high school. But I would get bored. I would want something different, something “more” and I would regret not moving to Montreal. As much as I want safety like most other people do, I need to figure out what I really like and what I really want and not be doing things because I feel I have to.

This is going to be scary. I have resigned myself to this fact. But I won’t let scary stop me from doing something that will help me grow and mature into the person I really want to be.

On the note of things Montreal, I need to complete the following tasks in preparation for the move:

- Make a doctors appointment and get all checked out before I go away.

- Go to the bank and sort out some financial things (such as getting me a cheque-book!).

- Figure out what to do with my cellular situation.

- Start throwing stuff out, deciding what I want to take to Montreal and maybe even doing some packing.

- Get in touch with people about the possible job.

- Any other thoughts? Hm. Oh, finish school.

Heading home to the T-dot for the weekend!